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Fat Tuesday

James Selman, long-time friend and Rapha Continental rider told me some years back something to the effect of "You don't get out of the saddle until April." To him winter and early spring are for building, so you sit, climb and strengthen.
After being on the road away from the bike the whole month of January, strength is something that I am very much lacking right now. Actually anything resembling fitness currently escapes me. So when I hit the base of a small rise (presently posing as a major hill) on a quick lunch spin on a sunny Portland winter day I thought of James when I saw a rider standing and stomping up the climb.
Wearing a classic Lemond long-sleeve team jersey and riding a lovely metallic purple Lemond of the same era, fully fendered for winter riding in Portland, I liked this gentleman's style. Still it's February 2nd, too early to be pouncing uphill.
Rolling by him with a simple "how's it going", I was immediately amused and understanding of his response.
Me: "How you doing?"
Lemond rider: "Fat."
Not a "good", or "alright", nor silence—just "fat". I couldn't have said it better myself.
I know that I am in fact not fat by any standard of American scales, but with a full month layoff coming on the heels of two weeks of post-cyclocross season blues, I am fat. For a cyclist. For me anyway. I can blame my slow pace on my lovely winter training Ira Ryan bicycle all I want but I don't have to pinch too hard to know the problem doesn't lay with the bike, but rather the rider.
Good news is that I also know the solution.

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Comments
rob meyers
3rd February 2010 04:10am
James has the right idea…….I don't even come out of the 39 until March!
Tym Lang
3rd February 2010 07:13am
I was feeling the last month & a half of barely riding today for sure, and spent too much time out of the saddle. Even had to stop and stretch before the St Johns Bridge. Totally sympathize with the Lemond rider.
Joe Hall
3rd February 2010 05:28pm
Thanks for this, Hotdog Olson, I am inspired to put down the kebab and get training… Just one more biscuit first though.
Graeme Raeburn
3rd February 2010 05:48pm
What type of hotdog is that Slate? I developed a particular penchant for trashy US nutrition when I was lucky enough to ride with the Continental last year, but I never saw anything like that.
Jon Cannings
3rd February 2010 06:54pm
G,
that's called a heart attack in a bun. one a year is enough.
Slate Olson
3rd February 2010 07:21pm
There is this spot in Austin, TX where they make happiness come to life. For an extra $1 you can have any of their franks sliced, stuffed with cheese and wrapped in bacon. Seriously, why would anyone ever pass that up? You can also get criss-cut fries with cheese and brown gravy. I watch Chris Distefano from Chris King eat three baskets of those one night.
Thomas Everson
3rd February 2010 08:20pm
Anarchy Burger!
Jon Cannings
3rd February 2010 11:14pm
lets get a road trip to Austin, TX Slate. I am down with that.
Slate Olson
4th February 2010 01:27am
There is this spot in Austin, TX where they make happiness come to life. For an extra $1 you can have any of their franks sliced, stuffed with cheese and wrapped in bacon. Seriously, why would anyone ever pass that up? You can also get criss-cut fries with cheese and brown gravy. I watch Chris Distefano from Chris King eat three baskets of those one night.
Dave Wyman
4th February 2010 05:42am
"trashy US nutrition"
"that's called a heart attack in a bun. one a year is enough."
NO! The belief that hotdogs dogs and bacon and cheese are are poor food choices, or fodder for a heart attack is old school, like thinking a leather "hairnet" offers anything more than anti-scalping protection.
It's the refined starch of the bun - a carbohydrate - that's dangerous to health. i'd stake my life on it. In fact, I have. No buns for me, but bring on the 'dogs!. ;-)
Philippe Plante
4th February 2010 03:27pm
Slate, the "You can also get criss-cut fries with cheese and brown gravy." is called a "poutine". It is a typical Quebec's trashy meal (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poutine).
Better eaten after riding…
Slate Olson
4th February 2010 04:33pm
Philippe, God bless the French Canadians.
Philippe Plante
4th February 2010 05:15pm
With the harsh winter months, we need some extreme fuel! Take care.
Kendall Sorensen
5th February 2010 04:42pm
And here I thought "Poutines" were Russian. I'd like to recommend a plate full of home cut fries, smothered in guvmint cheese and chile verde. That's sagebrush soul food and one of the reasons I'm allers achasing scrawnley little fellers up the hills hereabouts, wintertime, summertime, no matter.
Colin Engel
6th February 2010 04:14am
Kendall there's a Russian convenience store in Montreal that advertises their poutine with a homonymous reference to Vladimir Putin